Whether or not to go pee when you need to should not be an anxiety ridden choice, but for many trans people, including myself, it can be paralyzing. After coming out as a trans woman about six months ago, I have started using the correct bathroom when I feel brave enough. And let me tell you, I have many stories of the reactions people have had to me walking into the women’s bathrooms at the high school. I’ve had people chase me in to tell me I’m going to the wrong one, seen other women walk out to check the sign on the door, and so many other encounters.

To a cis person (someone whose gender matches their assigned sex), it may seem like a small and inconsequential change. However, being able to go to a bathroom that was purposefully marked as gender neutral shows me that in a world where transgender people are among the highest demographic victims of sexual assault, I am cared for. As a transgender woman, the fact that I have not yet been assaulted is testament to the extreme privilege I experience here in Brookline. While I may be in one of the safest towns for queer youth in the United States, on a larger scale, the fact that there is a chance greater than 50 percent that I will be assaulted at some point in my life sits with me every day. Although I can and do use the women’s bathrooms, it is not an anxiety free choice.

While I haven’t seen anyone openly criticize the new gender neutral bathrooms, I have heard a handful of people question the importance of them. I’m writing this to tell you that not only are they important, they are vital to the wellbeing, comfort and safety of many people in this school. These bathrooms provide a much needed safe space for non-binary people at the high school. Finally, they can use a bathroom that resonates with their identity. I cannot speak to that experience, but I’d like to recognize the importance this change holds to that community.

While I have only been challenged a handful of times, the thing that gets to me is the confused look on people’s faces, wondering if they had walked into the wrong bathroom. If I have not shaved in the last few days, I go out of my way to make sure I only go when it is least likely that I would run into someone else. Having bathrooms set aside as gender neutral means that I will never get any strange looks walking out of a stall, I will never be asked to leave, I will never be called a pervert, just for trying to pee.